Tag: saved by grace

Shifting From the Winds to the Eye of the Storm

Have you ever lived in a geographic location where you have to deal with the threat of possible hurricanes?  The weather guy has made his prediction that it’s a category 2 now but may strengthen and make landfall as a category 4 in the next 24 to 48 hours.  Should you run to the store and stock up on bread and bottled water?  Should you go to the nearest gas station and fill your vehicles and multiple gas cans…just in case?  Should you evacuate and hope everything is still standing when the storm is over?  Should you just stay put and not worry about anything because these things usually end up proving to be much less than predicted?

In recent months, I have found that my life has almost always consisted of preparations for the next “hurricane,” but in the last few years I have not been preparing as I should.  It took the most recent hurricane for me to realize just how ill-prepared I really am.  Four weeks ago, I moved out.  I left my husband whom I have been with for the last 25 years, and I am now living with my 22 year old son.  I was not really prepared for this hurricane at all.  At first, I thought the storm would completely blow over and dissipate as real hurricanes often do.  I was wrong.  The hurricane force winds are still blowing all around me as they have done for years, but one thing is very different.  I don’t feel those winds.  I am sitting comfortably in the eye of the storm.  I can see the winds, but they can’t touch me unless I allow myself to shift from the eye of the storm back into the actual storm itself.

Every day I spend out of the winds makes me realize a little more just how hard and how long they have been blowing.  I think I have been trying to stand upright in the strongest of hurricane winds for most of my life.  For years, I have fought to hold my life together using my own strength, but I have always known my own strength would never be enough.  I have always known that God was the only One strong enough to hold anything together, but I have consistently fought giving Him control.  Oh, I say all the right things: “I have given everything in this situation to God and will accept whatever He does to fix it.”  In reality, I may give it to Him, but I keep my grip firmly on one little corner and eventually pull the whole situation, no matter what it is, back on my own shoulders which have proven time and again to be too weak to carry the burden.

I am a fixer by nature.  I fix other peoples’ problems all the time.  I have many people who come to me at the first indication of a problem and ask for my advice and help.  I’ve been told I give good advice.  I help everyone else prepare for whatever hurricane they are living through, but when it comes to my own hurricanes I have consistently found myself ill-prepared.  I know where I need to go for hurricane provisions, but I have avoided gathering those provisions because I was afraid I would not find the answers I wanted mixed in with the bread and bottled water.  I was terrified that I would read Scripture and pray and realize that God never wanted me where I was and definitely wanted me elsewhere.  I have been terrified for a very long time, I think because I have known for a very long time that God did not want me to have ever stepped into the path of these particular winds.  I walked right into these hurricane force winds on my own and begged God to calm the storm.  Of course, He would calm the storm because He does not condone divorce, right?

God did not calm the storm.  He did not stop the winds.  He did not provide any way to survive in the storm.  Instead, He gave me numerous opportunities to walk out of the storm on my own, but I ignored those opportunities.  I was stubborn and stayed just to prove I could and used Scripture in the wrong way in order to excuse my bad decision.  I should have left at year two, at year five and at year twenty, but I didn’t.  I waited until twenty-five years were spent trying to stand in winds that no one can truly stand in.  For now, I will live my life in the eye where the winds cannot touch me.  I will use the hurricane provisions that God has generously supplied and remember, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)”

Tired of Praying? Me, too.

Do you ever get tired from the emotional strain of praying for the lost people whom you love?  I mean the kind of tired you feel after praying for years only to see that nothing ever seems to change in that person.  You’ve tried to be a good influence.  You’ve tried to help them in any way you can.  You’ve tried talking openly to them about faith, and you were repaid with accusations that you were judging them.  You’ve tried subtly trying to show them faith by living it as best you can in a terribly fallen world, and you were called a hypocrite with all of your flaws and failures thrown in your face.  You stepped back from the situation and tried to be just a friend on the outside while you prayed fervently on the inside and were accused of not being a good friend or family member because you weren’t doing enough.  You tried all of this but nothing ever changed.  It may even seem like the situation has become worse.  I’ve been that kind of tired.  It seems like I’ve spent the last few years that kind of tired.  As tiring and emotionally draining as this seemingly-fruitless praying can be, we can’t give up.  Praying for the lost is not a simple choice we make.  It is just one battle in a Spiritual war going on all around us every day.

“Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don’t believe.  They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News.  They don’t understand about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God (2 Corinthians 4:4 The Bible, New Living Translation).”  Satan first deceived himself; and ever since he first fell, he has been the deceiver to all.  There is no redemption for him, and he is determined to take as many of us with him as he can in the final Judgement.  If you are the kind of tired I am, then you, like me, know we have been given a way to escape Judgement.  John 3:16 is pretty recognizable, “For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life,” but John doesn’t stop there with the Good News.  “God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.  There is no judgement against anyone who believes in him.  But anyone who does not believe in him has already been judged for not believing in God’s one and only Son.  And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil.  All who do evil and hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed.  But those who do what is right come to the light so others can see that they are doing what God wants (John 3:17-21 The Bible, New Living Translation).”  That very last sentence says so much.  We are not to live up to the reputation that Christianity has earned for itself throughout the years.  We are to be real Christians, believers who truly try to follow Christ’s teaching, and we are to express His love to the world so that the world will see and feel His love for all people.  This includes those people who have already exhausted us and led us to nearly give up on them.

So if we can’t give up on our loved ones and we can’t really talk openly to them because they get angry, what are we left with?  We pray and we live the best we can, and we continue to do these things until we can’t do them any more.  We learn to love them like Christ loved them.  We remember that He never stopped loving them.  We never give up.  We remember, “The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground to water the earth.  They cause the grain to grow, producing seed for the farmer and bread for the hungry.  It is the same with my word.  I send it out, and it always produces fruit.  It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it (Isaiah 55:11-12 The Bible, New Living Translation).”   God will use your words, actions and prayers to plant seeds.

I recently heard a story about a man who was walking down George Street in Sydney, Australia when a man stepped from a doorway and handed him a tract.  That tract eventually let him to a relationship with Christ and he eventually became a preacher.  This preacher was later counseling a woman and asked where she heard about salvation.  She told him she had recently been walking on George Street in Sydney, Australia when a man stepped out of a doorway and gave her a tract.  Some time later, the preacher was talking to another person about where he learned about Christ.  He also mentioned the man on George Street.  After hearing the same story numerous times at conventions and meeting all over the world, the man decided to look up this man who had planted so many seeds on George Street.  When he told the man about the many people he had talked to who claimed their first step toward salvation was when he gave them a tract, the man broke down in tears.  This man had given out tracts for years on George Street and never knew anyone had ever been saved because of the seeds he planted.  It has been estimated that over 100,000 people were saved because this man never gave up.  He continued to do what God wanted him to as long as he was physically capable of doing it even though he never knew he had made a difference.

Don’t give up on your loved ones.  Keep praying.  God’s words will not return to Him without producing fruit.